Ricki Lake Made Me Have a Homebirth

In my spare time as of late I have been mulling over ACOG's statement regarding homebirth. I just can't help myself, so bear with me. Here is a little segment that is particularly offensive.

"Childbirth decisions should not be dictated or influenced by what's fashionable, trendy, or the latest cause célèbre. Despite the rosy picture painted by home birth advocates, a seemingly normal labor and delivery can quickly become life-threatening for both the mother and baby."

Not so surprising is that this statement appeared shortly after the movie The Business of Being Born came out. The movie was made in part by former TV talk show host Ricki Lake who is a homebirth advocate and had her second child at home.

Is ACOG really that worried about women having children at home because a former talk show host makes a small time movie about the joys of homebirth?! Seriously!? (Click here for a little article about the controversy.)

I really liked the movie actually. I own it and have watched it many times. And, truth be told, though it was not a huge hit , I have had a few students mention that they saw that movie and that is what set them on the path towards homebirth.

Homebirth is still small time. If people were swayed by that movie at all it was not because they want to do what the celebrities are doing. It was because Ricki made a good point and she backed it up with research and video.

She showed nurses talking about how EVERYBODY gets pitocin. She talked about the statistics. She interviewed smart, respected, famous people, some in high medical positions, who talked about the safety and benefits of homebirth. And then she was smart enough to show some amazing homebirths. Women birthing squatting in their own dang hallway buck naked instead of strapped to a bed with a stranger staring at their chart.

Women do not want to have a homebirth because Ricki had one, they want to have homebirths because they want a good birth. And they are smart enough to realize that they come few and far between in a hospital.

I do not really believe that ACOG is sincerely worried about women leaving their hospitals in droves because a nineties talk show host thinks it is a good idea. I also do not think they are really concerned with mine or your health and safety. I think they know that birth can be AMAZING. They know it can be CHEAP. They know that they are UNNECESSARY 95% of the time. And that is something they most definitely DO NOT want you to know.

If only Oprah would have a homebirth.....

Ladies, I think we are just going to have to create this change on our own.

Serenity's Birth-

I love this birth from a student and friend of mine!! It is just so fantastic to be part of this fabulous journey called motherhood.  This is the mothers third baby and third unmedicated birth.  I love how it shows one of the most amazing things about the everyday event of birth- it is always sacred.  But my favorite thing about this birth is how mama stayed calm and it kept the birth, the doctors, and the entire situation calm.  Ladies- we have great power over our births if we are educated and advocate for ourselves!!

Enjoy!

This baby has been really active through out the whole pregnancy. So it was no 

shock to me that she would be in a different position at every appointment. She 

has been transverse, breech, and head down. When I was 38 weeks the midwives

and doctor started to get worried that she wouldn't turn in time and/or stay that way

even if she did. (I wasn't worried!) I figured that if she had enough room to move and

flip as often as she does there should be nothing to worry about! 

Yet at 41 weeks she was breech again with low fluids, so I agreed to a version

in the office without any drugs. It worked. The doctor wanted me to start induction 

that day, but I was firm in letting my husband know what was going on and I wanted 

to pray about it and even get a blessing.

I am so grateful for getting a blessing! It was beautiful and helped me be confident in the choices I

made for the labor and delivery of our baby. (I know that it also gave my mom the assurance she 

needed to be able to be calm and help coach me through this time!) My husband has never doubted

that I could do this! :) So grateful that I can count on him to be there and just believe I can do it.

After the baby being in several different positions with each appointment and low fluids.  I finally decided to let them strip the membranes 9 days after their estimated due date.  Labor started within an hour!  With taking Bradley Method classes (which also helped my mom with ideas on how she could help me relax.)  I learned more on how to stay relaxed through the contractions.  I stayed busy and relaxed when I needed to.

My husband and mom were with me helping me whenever I needed them.  Around 7pm we set up someone to come get our daughters.  We relaxed a little while longer at home.  

At the hospital I stayed moving most of the time just to keep things moving along.  Walking the halls with my mom rubbing my back and talking to me with each contraction.  During monitoring us at one point I had a contraction where they lost the heart beat for to long.  I opened my eyes to 4 women standing next to me in a panic.  I told them that "it was just a really good contractions with her stretching out."  (It actually made me laugh at them!)  I felt calm, confident and happy that I could tell them everything was fine!  

Around 2am I felt like they were getting more intense in my back, so I got into the shower.  How lovely that hot water felt hitting my back!  After some time on the birthing ball I felt better pushing some through them, so told them that.  My midwife checked me and I was a stretchy 9cm so I started to push with the contractions.  I got to be empowered and tell them she was fine again while I got ready to push. She had just moved farther into the birth canal and they lost her heart beat again.  And I said "oh she is fine, she just kicked me!"  They seemed to be more calm about it just because I knew she was fine and I wasn't worried!

I believe it took me a handful of pushes to get her head out and one last one for the rest of her!  We had another beautiful baby girl! We got to nursing within 15 minutes of her birth.  We bonded with her for more than an hour before we just had to find out how big she was!  We named her Serenity Noelle. A couple short hours later she got to meet her two big sisters.  I am so happy that I was able to stick up for myself and my little one so well this time around.  And most important, I thank my Father in Heaven for all His help and guidance through this pregnancy.  Maybe next time I will be even braver and go with a HOMEBIRTH!

Only Dirty Hippies Birth At Home

I ran into somebody the other day who it turned out was using the same midwife I had for my homebirth. I had met her once before and was really surprised to find that she was planning a homebirth.  I think I even said, "Oh- I wouldn't have pegged you as a homebirth mama." 

Later I realized how biased I was being.  Any type of woman can birth at home.  And it seems to me that more and more of them are.  We (or I) tend to think of people having their babies at home being women who are kind of alternative, maybe braid their hair, use natural deodorant, don't shave, go to chiropractors and all "that stuff".

When I take a step back I realize that I don't even fit all that criteria.  And more and more I am seeing women choose homebirth who I never would have expected to do so.  Women who look "normal".  Women who go to church.  Women who don't dislike modern medicine.  Women who are just your neighbors and friends but want something more than what is offered in hospitals. 

Why are these women choosing homebirth?  When I ask them I find that they just want a natural birth experience.  They feel they will be most comfortable in their own home.  They don't want the interruption of traveling and arriving and checking into the hospital.  Most of all they do not want to be another one of those one in three who have abdominal surgery to remove their baby.  They realize that the "normal" hospital birth is not really that normal and certainly is not natural. 

I love Ina May Gaskin.  I love her books where women talk about feeling "high" while they are in labor. I love hippies.  I have even been called one a time or two.  But what I love even more is that women who appear "normal" and mainstream are choosing homebirth.  I also love that ACOG and all their knife wielding cronies are running a little scared as they start to realize that a tiny minority of women are choosing to birth on their own terms.  They are scared because they realize that we as birthing women have the power to CHANGE OBSTETRICS all on our own.  All we have to do is realize that homebirth is not just for fringe hippies who live on communes, it is for anybody who recognizes the power of their own body. 

Take back your power.  Choose natural birth.

What To Do When Your Friend is Having a "GASP" HOMEBIRTH!!!

Well first- I must admit that I too am one of those nutty homebirth-ers but I am here to walk you through the process of dealing with your friend and her crazy choice.  I am probably on the other side of the spectrum- sometimes I look like the woman above when I hear that somebody has already scheduled their c-section and they are only 32 weeks along....

I know you have heard many freaky stories about how scary and painful birth is.  Maybe you have even had one of these experiences.   These tips should help anyway.  

ONE-  Homebirth is actually relatively safe.  

In fact, for a low risk woman it is as safe as a hospital  birth, with the main difference being less interventions and a mom that is happier with the outcome than the usual hospital birth mom.   Most well intentioned friends and family of a homebirth mom are usually mostly worried that something will go terribly wrong and because they are not in a hospital, somebody will be hurt that didn't have to be.  Here is an article with research showing how safe a planned homebirth actually is.  

The truth is that a good homebirth midwife does not just show up with a stick and some hot towels.  She comes with everything from oxygen, to an IV to medications to stop hemorrhage (one of the biggest risks for a mom).  A good midwife should also arrive with years of experience, schooling and hundreds of births under her belt.  She also comes with another midwife in case something were to go wrong, there would be somebody to attend to both mother and baby.    

In general, things in birth go wrong slowly, with time to transfer.  Rarely do things go so wrong so quickly that being at home is fatal.   Important to remember also- when birth is left alone, things often go just fine. 

TWO-  Your homebirth friend is most likely well informed.  

Having a homebirth is actually a pretty big responsibility.  Most often, homebirth mom's do lots of research and preparation for the experience.  They don't  have the option of just sitting back and trusting that their care provider will take care of everything.  They are an integral player (in fact THE player) in this whole process.  They know what kind of choice they are making.  They know the risks, and they know the benefits.  This mama has decided because of many factors, and lots of thought, research, and prayer, that homebirth is the best option for her birth. 

Instead of fearing for her, you can rest assured that she probably knows more about the normal process of birth than most women who deliver in a hospital.  She is making a conscious, thoughtful choice. 


THREE- Your friend's homebirth choice is not a judgment of your choices in birth. 

Maybe your friend does actually think she is better than you because she is choosing a homebirth, but most likely, she is just excited about sharing the knowledge that she is gathering.  She does not necessarily think that you or everybody should have a homebirth.  She just thinks that she should, and that it is the best option for her. 

Please, don't assume that there is any judgment implied because her choice is different than the vast majority of other people.  I have had babies in a hospital, a birth center, and at home.  I made different choices each time based on many factors.  I would never tell somebody where they should give birth.  That is up to them.  In fact forcing or coercing anther's birth choice is very much against all of my beliefs about birth.  Choice is one of the reasons I chose homebirth, and it is a thing to be protected, no matter what choices people make. 

Conclusion- 

In the end, it doesn't really matter what you think (did that sound harsh?).  This choice is up to each individual woman.  Friends do not really want to be judged by one another, they just want to be loved, supported and trusted.   That is what your friend needs from you right now, even if you are scared for her.  I am so often saddened when talking to homebirth mamas who are scared to mention their choice to family and friends.  What a sad state that they feel that those who love them the most actually want them to fail!   How distressing that they can not share such a deeply personal choice with those around them because of fear of judgment.  So- root for her and hope for the best.  And instead of worrying, do some of your own reading, you just might realize why she is choosing a homebirth. 

Natural Birth and Chiropractic

My husband is a Chiropractor, and recently has switched over to Upper Cervical Chiropractic.  I obviously, am a natural birth nut, teach Bradley, and basically try to convince people I am right!  Despite any disagreements in our marriage, one thing we agree on is the amazing ability of the body to do its job.

The Amazing Human Body

We were talking last night about real Chiropractic.  There are all kinds of chiropractors out there, practicing seemingly endless kinds of Chiropractic, from AK docs who hardly even adjust to the basic Diversified chiro.  Nathan, my hubby is probably on the other end of things, he only adjusts the first two bones in the spine, C1 and C2.  He genuinely believes that the body has an amazing ability to heal itself.  He just opens up the channel so that the body can fix itself, he doesn't really heal anything- just lets the body do it on its own.

Think about that for a minute- because it is very different from traditional medicine.  The body wants to be well.  It can heal a cut, a burn, a cold, a broken leg.  It can digest food, cool itself, and beat your heart all without being consciously told - it knows what to do.  Some Chiropractors call this the innate intelligence.  It is your body's inherent ability to do it's job without instruction from outside of it.  A real chiropractor just opens the channel, by adjusting the atlas and lets the body heal its own disease.  It is not just about pain- it is about healing and wellness.

Now think about traditional medicine and how it looks at the body.  Your blood pressure is high- take a pill to lower it.  That one doesn't work- thats cool- take another.  Feeling depressed- take a pill.  Bad knee- well-the body doesn't last forever- get surgery- we can fix it.  Backed up- take a laxative.  And around and around we go.

What is wrong with this outlook?  It comes down to looking at the human body like it is flawed.  It colors every aspect of traditional medicine and it makes for an outside in approach rather than an inside out approach.  Instead of letting the body that knows how to work, heal itself, we give it pills or surgery to fix its imperfections.


What Does This Have To Do With Childbirth?

Everything.  If your doctor or midwife thinks that the human body is flawed and needs help, if they think that your body and your birth are nothing more than an accident waiting to happen, it will change the way they view labor and birth.  It will change the way they treat you.  It will change your entire birth experience.

Do you think I'm kidding?  I heard of a doctor in Dallas, who refereed to a c-section as a "vaginal bypass".  He actually thought that the female body had a design flaw.  He was a friendly, funny guy, but he did mostly c-sections.

You need to know how your care provider looks at the female body and the beauty of birth.  If they think it is dangerous and you are not capable of doing it on your own most of the time, you have a problem.  It does not matter how nice they are.  It does not matter if they are funny.  What matters is if they actually believe that women are designed to birth babies.  They must believe that birth is inherently safe- with occasional emergencies.  They must view themselves as lifeguards in this beautiful dance rather than a savior in a white coat with a shining scalpel.  They must believe in birth and believe in you and your body.  Too bad chiropractors don't catch babies....
But there are all these great gals called home-birth midwives.